"Speak" by Laurie Halse Anderson

Genre: Contemporary Fiction

Page Count: 200+ pages 

Published: 2019

Potential Triggers: attempts at self-harm, mentions of suicide/suicide ideation, rape, bullying 

Mental Health Topics: depression, PTSD

Speak is a fictional book based on events that Anderson–and, unfortunately, many others–have been victims of. Rape is a significant theme throughout Speak, whose effects are portrayed through our main character and new freshman, Melinda Sordino. 

We know little about Melinda at first; we know she attended a party during the summer, we know something terrible happened, and we know she lost all her friends because of the events that occurred during the party. As the book progresses, we learn more and more about what happened and why everyone at school seems to hate her. Throughout this book, rape is the unnamed villain who stalks every word, thickening the dread with every page. 

Having witnessed the effects of rape firsthand in my own life, I can confidently say this book showed the impact and emotions almost perfectly. It truly does isolate you and make you feel alone. It’s impossible to talk about, and it feels so embarrassing. And the effects it has makes everyday life feel impossible. Melinda never told anyone until she was forced to out of fear of her ex-best friend, who just so happened to be dating her rapist. 

The antagonist, whom we know as "IT," is Andy Evans. The amount of terror Anderson fed the reader as Melinda faced him throughout the book leaves you with disgust. This part of the book hit home for me. It’s hard to acknowledge your rapist as more than a monster, much less a human being. And Anderson displayed that flawlessly, once again. 

While the book doesn't explicitly state that Melinda deals with depression as an everlasting scar from her experiences, there are tell-tale signs throughout the book.

Throughout the book, we watch Melinda struggle. She struggles with making friends and being an outcast at school, struggles in school, and most of all, struggles with a mix of deep depression and anxiety that only traumatic events seem to trigger. Melinda spent the school year struggling to keep up with school, so overcome with anxiety of facing her abuser every day. She doesn't know who she can trust, always worried that she might be used again. Relationships fail. Her parents don't pay enough attention to the issues going on in Melinda's life, leaving her disconnected from them. The only person who cared to hang out used her to get into a different group and then leave Melinda alone again.

On top of her struggles of being a teenage victim, Melinda's energy is low throughout the entire book. She's constantly tired. Not tired in the sense of wanting to sleep. But exhausted from existing. The only solace she experiences is in her art class, where she channels her energy into creating a sculpture that doesn't seem to work with her. Melinda is constantly talking about how she just wants to leave throughout the book. Leave the school. Leave her old friends. Leave the house of her only acquaintance. And occasionally, for a brief moment, wants to leave her life behind.

Speak was an excellent book, handling rape with scenes and emotions that accurately portray how it ruins lives while keeping the details minimal to avoid triggers as much as possible. It’s hard to simply just handle rape by itself, but it’s even harder to deal with it during high school. And hardest to handle alone.

This book was a dark and challenging book to read. Seeing so much of it reflect my own life made it more challenging. But it is necessary to spread how much rape causes lives to fall apart and to spread awareness of the devastating effects it has on innocent victims.